unfoggedlotus | IC Inbox

"Yeah," Ren repeats, softly, wrapping his arm around the boyfriend. He knows how much betrayal and abandonment hurt him; it's why he clinks their rings together. Forever. That's what he promised, that's what he'll deliver. "She's in the wrong, too. Glitch has more problems than just a few programming bugs." He pets Goro.

"I'm not happy that I'm angry with her. It'd be so much simpler if I wasn't, but it's how I feel." Even so, he leans into the touch. He should really finish eating, but he's just so tired.

"What are we even going to tell Magpie? How do we even start a conversation about this?"

He knows they have to. He volunteered, it's just... hard.

"Tell him the truth and have your younger self make puppydog eyes at him?" He jokes, weakly. "We'll come up with something in the morning..."

Ren looks over to Boyfriend The Second, taking another bite of his ramen. "How are you holding up?"

"And you're sure it can wait until morning..." Goro hardly sounds convinced as he attempts another bite.

His Shadow hums. "More concerned than anything. I wasn't thrilled with what happened back there, but it's difficult for me to get angry. Those emotions weren't part of my... conception, I suppose."

"Those are in Loki?" Ren guesses. Then, just for good measure: "You aren't bad for feeling angry or being a hypocrite back there. Feelings are one thing, actions are another, y'know?"

"More or less," his Shadow says. "I'm sure I could get angry if pressed hard enough, but I think I'm more likely to feel sadness than more hotblooded emotions."

Goro heaves a heavy sigh. "The problem is when my actions end up hurting the people I care about. I'm sure Drake won't be happy with me regardless of what I do."

"I'm sure Drake can come to his own conclusions after he gets the Palace out of his head," Ren asserts, poking him. "You're catastrophizing. Your therapist told me about it."

"...Of course she did." Damn it, Maki. Why are you so good at actually caring about the needs of your clients? "Perhaps I'd be in a better place if she was here. It's so hard to put her techniques into practice without her to remind me when I slip."

He pauses.

"So I do appreciate it, Ren."

"We could all use some good therapy," he nods. "She didn't tell me about you catastrophizing specifically. Just how to identify it." He leans over to kiss the boyfriend. "We'll get through this."

Naturally, Goro kisses back. He needs it right now. "I know, but..."

His Shadow clears his throat. "If you need something to do, perhaps it might be worthwhile to text Magpie? Some of the information may be easier to present that way, so that when we do go to speak with him in person, he's had time to mentally prepare himself."

Ren sighs. "If you think you're in a good enough state." He glances down at Goro's bowl. "After a few more bites of food."

"Yes, yes. I know..." He should probably eat it before it gets too cold, anyway, so back to the ramen he goes. "Ha. Magpie would be so disappointed that we're eating here, but sometimes you need the simple pleasures."

His Shadow enjoys his own meal with a pleased little hum. "You've a personal connection that he lacks as well. This was the original meeting place, after all..."

True enough, heh.

Once Crow's had enough to eat, he takes out his phone. "I'm not sure how long this is going to take, but let's see..."

A conversation soon follows, ending when Crow decides to give Magpie space. Once it reaches that point, he leans back in his chair with another, softer sigh.

"Seems Raven is ready to pounce, so by the time we get home, he may be primed to speak with us."

"Magpie's a snob," Ren laughs, lighthearted. "More cheap, shitty, delicious ramen for us."

And...hmm. He's been so distracted by the everything of today that he hasn't even noticed his own mini-self doing things. "Ren's curious, but he's keeping the little guys busy for now."

"We really should get him a codename." In part because Goro sees this Ren as 'Ren,' but they can worry about that later. "I think Raven may be a bit frustrated that we've been so secretive about the Palace. He mentioned Glitch, and..."

His Shadow tsks. "To be fair, you have access to his every waking moment. I can see why he'd be frustrated."

"We should. Maybe he'll like Lotus..." Ren hums. "Yeah. Kinda sucks that he gets no privacy."

"Lotus is taken, I'm afraid, but I'm sure there's something else we can use." He looks down at his phone, frowning. "I think... I'm going to contact Drake. I doubt it will help, but I can't in good conscience leave things as they were if we're to resume the mission."

Ren sighs. The Boyfriend will not rest until his does this, huh... "Just let me see what you're sending him, ok?"

"Of course." Goro types up the message first, then shows him what it says. "I suppose, if nothing else, it'll be there when this is all said and done. It truly is just..."

His Shadow offers him a soft, sympathetic look. "I believe what happened at the Palace reminds him too much of the day he fully awakened Loki's powers."

Edited 2024-07-10 21:09 (UTC)

Ren nods at ShadowKechi. "We need to get you a name, too," he reminds him. "Thanks."

It frustrates him, that he wasn't there to see Loki awakened. There's so much stuff underneath that experience, and he wants to dig down deep inside his boyfriend and gnaw it all from the depths of his soul until he knows it like it happened to him all and he carries it instead. But he can't. His grip on the chopsticks tightens slightly, but he takes a few more bites to calm himself down.

Edited 2024-07-10 23:04 (UTC)

"I wish it was easier to simply settle on a name." Now it's the Shadow's turn to sigh. "I know I could experiment, but it's hard to find the confidence to try."

Crow nibbles a little more, but when the reply comes from Ren, he freezes up, nearly dropping his phone.

He shuts his eyes, breathes in, and then slides it over.

"We're going to have to bring this up with him."

"You're working on it with Aki-chan, right?" Ren grins, then sees Crow freeze. "Hey, are you..."

He takes Goro's phone. Reads the screenshots once, twice, three times before the words sink in.

Edited 2024-07-11 01:36 (UTC)

Yeah. Yeah, we're gonna 'bring it up to him' all right, something deep inside Ren snarls. I'm gonna bring his asshole up to his ribs.

Shut up, he snaps back. "It's official. I've seen toddlers more well-behaved than Magpie."

"I had hoped for something more flattering, but this..." Ugh. He digs his fingers into his hair again. "I can see why Drake reacted so poorly, putting it all into context. The message was already atrocious on its own, and yet..."

Shit. Okay. Breathing. He needs to breathe. He needs to stay calm.

"So. How do you intend to proceed?" Best to gauge where Ren stands.

"I wouldn't be any better than him if I actually lashed out at him for hurting you," Ren says, flat. "So...I'm gonna spend a few minutes dismembering him in my mind until I calm down."

Edited 2024-07-11 02:04 (UTC)

"...I understand." He hardly sounds happy about it, and his Shadow avoids eye contact, soaking in the tension radiating from them both.

He doesn't speak up, though. It's not his place.

Goro needs to ground himself. Needs to keep his head on straight. "We aren't kicking him out. That does not mean he's off the hook, but even at his worst, Magpie needs someone. I can't give up on him, but that doesn't mean I'm going to ignore the hurt he caused back then."

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